Wrong Assumptions, Bad Jokes
by czarinaandrea
Summary: Everybody makes a wrong assumption because of a bad joke.
1. Chapter 1

TITLE: WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES

**TITLE: WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES**

**Rating: T**

**Summary: Everyone makes the wrong assumptions because of a bad joke.**

**Chapter 1**

**WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES**

_**Edward's POV**_

"Where could it be?" I muttered to myself.

I was inside Renesmee's room looking for the book _Wuthering Heights_. This was a book Bella read to Renesmee last night, but Bella didn't finish, I guess Renesmee wants me to finish it for her. I went to the far end of the room where the bookshelf is located. I immediately found the book and I ran to Renesmee. But I found Rosalie blocking my way.

"Rosalie! Please get out of my way." I said impatiently.

"No. Edward please make love with me now." She said as she straightened up to emphasize her breasts.

I didn't look down. I looked straight at her face. Instead, I pushed her out of my way, but she caught my shirt and I was suddenly on top of her in our bed- mine and Bella's. I struggled to get free and I tried reading her mind, but she was thinking of other things. I shuddered. I couldn't believe she had a strong hold on me. Without warning, she pulled me toward her and she kissed me while her hands worked with my chest. I had enough and slapped her in the face.

"Rosalie. Leave me alone." I opened the window in our room and threw her out. I hurriedly went to Renesmee but she wasn't there.

_**Renesmee's POV**_

Where could daddy be? He's so long! What was that? A sound of a creaking bed? Daddy's sleeping? I hurriedly went to my Mommy and Daddy's room and saw Daddy on top of Aunt Rosalie. Their lips were together and Aunt Rosalie was rubbing Daddy's chest. What is this? I guess I'll ask Mommy. With that in my mind, I hurriedly went to Mommy back to Carlisle's house.

_**Bella's POV**_

"Hi Alice! What's up?" I asked her as I got into the kitchen.

She looked at me. I hurried to her side and patted her arm.

"What's wrong?" I asked anxiously.

"Renesmee's on her way alone Bella. At least I think it's her, I can't see properly. Bella, whatever Renesmee shows you, don't believe it right away okay? Listen to Edward first." She told me.

I just nodded. Judging by her looks, it's something bad.

"Thank you Alice." I said as I kissed her right cheek and went out of the kitchen to meet Renesmee.

And there she was in Carlisle's arms and it looked like she was showing something to him. As Renesmee lowered her hand, Carlisle looked at me sadly and worriedly.

I rushed to his side and took Renesmee out of his arms. Carlisle together with Esme, Emmett and Jasper went to the kitchen were Alice was. After a few seconds they went out of the kitchen and went outside through the front door. They looked at me from a distance and stayed there. I looked at Renesmee and she placed her hand on my cheek. I saw the whole thing. Edward on top of Rosalie. Making love on our bed. She put down her hand and looked at me, worried.

"Mommy, what's wrong?" Renesmee asked.

"Nothing's wrong dear." I said as I softly kissed the top of her head.

At the same time, I smelled Jacob's scent. Good timing too. I needed my hands free for later.

"Hiya Bella!" greeted Jacob, half-naked.

"Hi Jacob!" I said. A greeted him with a smile that I hoped didn't betray my anger.

"My Jacob!" said Renesmee, reaching out to him impatiently.

"Don't tell Jacob anything, okay Renesmee?" I whispered to her only.

She nodded. In a short time, I was by Jacob's side. I gave her to Jacob and then Renesmee kissed him on the cheek. I saw Jacob blush scarlet.

"Um, Be-Bella, we're go-going to Charlie to-today. I-it's fine ri-right?" he stuttered.

I smiled. It's amazing what Renesmee could do to Jacob. I nodded and watched them go. Within second, they were gone.

I sensed that my family was inside the house already. Because when I looked at the place they stood at earlier, they were gone. Just when I was to look at them behind me, Edward arrived and kissed me. I didn't want to break the passionate kiss, but I tasted Rosalie's breath on Edward's lips and I slapped him on the face.

"Bella!" Edward said in surprise.

"How dare you kiss me like that?! You just made love with Rosalie! How could you?!" I shouted and went to his room and slammed the door hard.

**END OF CHAPTER 1!! Please review before you read the last chapter!**


	2. Chapter 2

TITLE: WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES

**TITLE: WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES**

**Rating: T**

**Summary: Edward explains while Emmett does something nasty.**

**Chapter 2**

**WRONG ASSUMPTIONS, BAD JOKES**

_**Edward's POV**_

"What's she talking about?" I asked them.

"Renesmee showed us what you did with Rosalie." Replied Jasper.

That hit a nerve and rang a bell. So they know. I stared at my family and realized that Emmett and Rosalie weren't there.

"Carlisle, you know that I can't do such a thing." I told my father as I faced him.

"We know son, but Bella's too confused right now." Said Carlisle

_It's too hard to explain Edward_ Carlisle thought as I read his mind.

I nodded. I have to wait for Bella to calm down. Damn Rosalie to the deepest pits of hell where she belongs! This is all her fault! And I bet Emmett is in on it too. But what will Emmett possibly do? I shook my head, not wanting to think about what he will do.

I sat down on our sofa and closed my eyes. How am I going to solve this?

_**Bella's POV**_

Oh, how could he do this? To me? His wife? And I thought he loved me! I hate it!

"How could he do this to me?" I said to myself, shaking my head.

Then I heard Emmett come through the window.

"What're you doing here Emmett?" I asked furiously.

"Rosalie betrayed me like Edward betrayed you. Now all I need is a release from this pain. And I want you to release it for me Bella." He said as he pushed me down Edward's sofa.

I got pissed off. I kicked him hard on the stomach and threw him out of Edward's room. The impact he made on the door was disastrous. The door's hinges were broken and the knob flew off downstairs. His crash broke something that sounded like the chandelier and a growl came from Alice.

"What the heck Emmett?!" Alice said.

"What the heck? It's Bella!" he answered back.

"I meant the reason why she threw you out like that." Alice said sternly.

"You don't need to know. I'm guessing you know already." Said Emmett, straightening up.

"You bet I do." Said Alice, crouching.

"You want a fight midget?" teased Emmett, crouching too.

"Don't talk to Alice like that!" shouted Jasper, crouching in front of Alice protectively.

Carlisle coughed. Everybody straightened up. They stayed silent and then I went down. They were all looking at me. I looked at them as well but I did not look at Edward's face-at least, not yet. Which was true, since I looked at him for a brief second and looked away again.

I saw Edward stare at the back of Emmett's head and suddenly, he growled. I just realized what he saw. Emmett trying to rape me. Edward stood up and forced Emmett to face him. Then, Edward punched Emmett's face. I rushed to Edward and stopped from doing any more harm.

"Edward!" Carlisle said in shock.

"It's fine. I've got him Carlisle." I reassured him.

I went in front of Edward and blocked him from Emmett's view.

"Aww! Come on now Bella! You'd protect that adulterer?" asked Emmett.

I growled at him and crouched. I lunged for his throat, but I saw Rosalie in front of me. I stopped on my tracks.

"Emmett, I think this is too much." Rosalie muttered.

"Aww! And I was having fun too! Okay, let's end this." Emmett agreed.

They looked at us. I held Edward's hand and squeezed it. I hope he knew what it meant. I looked at him and saw him smile my favourite smile. I was forgiven for my rude actions earlier.

"Emmett, Rosalie, what's going on?" Esme asked, talking for the first time today.

"Yeah, what the hell are you guys doing?!" asked Edward, his hands trembling with anger. I squeezed his hand again.

"What day is it today?" Emmett asked.

And then it hit us. It was April 1st. Today is April Fools' Day. So, everything they did was a bad joke. A bad, disgusting joke. And worse, I jumped to the wrong assumption. I released Edward's hand and crouched. Seeing from the corner of my eye, Edward crouched too.

"Joke?! You'll see what joke is." I muttered.

We attacked them and to our surprise, the others did as well. We ripped them into shreds. We left the pieces of them on the living room floor, struggling to put themselves back together, while we went hunting.

**END OF THE STORY! Please review!**


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